"Doctor," she said loudly, bouncing into the room, "I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me."

He surveyed her from head to food. "Madam," he said at length, "I've just three things to tell you.

"First, your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty pounds.

"Second, your beauty would be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick.

"And third, I'm an artist---the doctor lives on the next floor."

Women give themselves to God when the Devil wants nothing more to do with them.

---Sophie Arnould