28May11

The sad-looking man had been waiting a long time for his order, Finally his waiter approached, and said:
“Your fish will be coming in a minute or two now, sir.”
The sad man looked interested.
“Tell me,” he said, “what bait are you using?”

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Education is the next important factor in planning ahead for the future. It is essential to be mentally alert and educated in order to plan ahead for financial and physical welfare as well as for pleasure and profit.
Never before in the history of our country has it been so important that we reach the top of our professions. With the rapid socialization of our government, the educated people will be given the positions of authority.
It is important to have the ability to recognize a problem and have the judgment to solve it successfully.
Today there is no excuse for not getting an education. If the student shows an ambition to learn and wants to continue his training through college, federal aid is standing ready to help. Another great help is technical training. Vocational instruction is preparing students for jobs that are open. They can work while going to school.
Just what will this education do for you? It will not only help you financially and socially, but it will place you in position to enjoy life by having some knowledge of music, of literature and art. You can better enjoy good books and plays. With our great increase in travel, it will aid us to enjoy what we see and the history of the countries we visit. You will also be in position to teach your children and prepare them for a greater life.
We are fast becoming a welfare state and history tells us that this is the curse that kills. Education will help us look over history and see what happened to ancient Greece, to the Roman Empire, and many others. We hope we are educated to stand upon our own feet. Personal freedom is one of God’s most cherished gifts to mankind. Maintaining it requires the highest form of understanding, courage, and faith.

Abraham Lincoln knew government and what was necessary for people to remain free. He gave us ten rules that I feel are very important.
1~You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than you earn.
2~You cannot help the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.
3~You cannot establish sound security by borrowed money.
4~You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
5~You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
6~You cannot help little men by tearing down big men.
7~You cannot further the brotherhood of man by encouraging class hatred.
8~You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich
9~You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they could do themselves.
10~You cannot build character and courage by taking away men’s initiative and independence.

I have over the last few months been reading a lot of stories about President Lincoln and I am going to start sharing these as I go along~~He is one of my most favorite presidents not only because he was steadfast in his commitment to this country but mainly because of his courage to stay the course in his beliefs when this great nation of ours was divided against itself

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Here is another story about Abraham Lincoln past President of
the United States

The Southern commissioners had
dined with President Lincoln and
General Grant. When the commissioners
left, Alexander H. Stephens (a little
man, whose top weight was ninety
pounds) enveloped his short, slender
form in an English ulster, its tails
falling to the ground its collar
sticking above Stephens' head. As
Stephens made his exit, Lincoln
exclaimed: "Grant, look at Stephens,
Did you ever see such a little nubbin
with as much shuck?"

27may11

Diner--"Waiter, how was this steak cooked?"
Waiter--"Smothered in onions sir."
"Well, it died hard."



Woodrow Wilson once said, "Fear God and you need not be afraid of anyone else." St. Paul feared God more than man. That is why he suffered matyrdom. Joan of Arc feared disobedience to God more than to man, and that is why she was unmoved when flames began to surround her. In your last years cling to the Captain of your life and you will have no harmful fears.
Fear and worry go hand in hand and the remedy for one is the same as the remedy for the other. These two probably cause more deaths than any disease that you could have. As with fear, it is important that you worry for your protection and advancement, but you must know how to distinguish when it is for your good or when it will do you harm.
Dr. Alex Carrell aptly said, “Men who don’t know how to overcome fear and worry die young.”
Not only do you worry over things that never happen, you worry also about things that have already happened. Many people worry about growing old. Obviously, this one of the quickest ways to hasten the aging process A child once asked his grandfather, “Isn’t it awful to be old”? The old man replied, “No, if I were not old, I would be dead.”
As you have heard many time, age is evaluated not in terms of the passage of years but of interests. Many people in their eighties are so intellectually and spiritually alive that the passage of years is of small significance.

Grow old along with me,
The best is yet to be.
The last of life, for which the
First was made.
Our times are in His hand…
------------------------Robert Browning.
.

26May11

“No,” snapped the old man, as he scanned the menu. “I won’t have any mushrooms, waiter. I was nearly poisoned by them last week.”
The waiter leaned confidingly across the table.
“Is that really so sir?” he said, blandly. “Then I’ve won my bet with the cook.”

Two of the greatest problems you have throughout life and especially in your later years are fear and worry. Here is where religion will help you the most. You can turn your fears and worries over to a power higher than your own and get results.
Two ailments fear and worry. They bring on heart attacks, strokes, mental disturbances, as well as many other things. You have heard or read that much of your fear and anxiety is over things that never happen.
Whether you like to admit it or not, you must agree that fear is a major problem in the life of each of us.
We have public fears and we have private fears.
Fear is good in some instances, for it is a motivating power that causes you to go forward and make progress, but it should not be allowed to go untrammeled such that it becomes so devastating a factor as to produce failure. The problem is not how to get rid of fear, but how to use it properly. Wild animals would not live long if they did not respond actively to their sense of fear.
Someone has said that the basis of action should be love and not fear. Theoretically that is true, but in practice it does not work out that way. You pay your income taxes, but you do not love doing so. Fear of a penalty motivates you. You see, there are legitimate fears. Fear of ignorance causes you to seek an education, and fear of poverty makes you work. Fear of disease motivates you to practice healthy and sanitary living. So you see fear is very important in your life if acted upon intelligently. You must learn to distinguish helpful and harmful fears.

25May11
They laughed when the waiter spoke to me in Greek, but their laughter changed to astonishment at my ready reply:
"I wanna roasta bif san'wich, str-r-romberry pie, two cup skawfee."

All that is on the news today are the tornados that went through Joplin Missouri, Oklahoma and parts of Texas.
Sad stories about the problems and what FEMA is and is not gonna do.~~And of course there are always
the economic problems that everyone is trying to deal with~~Is there any solution to anything in this
country anymore??

Next order of business for this blog is jokes of some sort!! And of course a saying for the day~~I used to run history on certain days but I don’t know if I wanna do that anymore~~Pictures always breaks up
the monotony and I am uncertain about the format I want to put this all into~~I really like to keep something that is light and palatable for myself so we shall see as I go along

24May11
Well here I am again on here~~After a little vacation on facebook haha!! Looks like I am going to have to start from scratch again~~

24oct10

I'm sorry, said the diner, who hoped to get away with it, but I haven't any money to pay for that meal.
That's all right, said the cashier. We'll write your name on the wall and you can pay the next time you come in.
Don't do that. Everybody who comes in will see it.
Oh no they won't. Your overcoat will be hanging over it.


Bisquit Tortoni was the man who discovered radio.

22Oct10

A customer sat down at a table in a smart restaurant and tied a napkin around his neck. The scandalized manager called a waiter and instructed him, Try to make him understand, as tactfully as possible, that that's not done.
Said the thoughtful waiter to the customer: Pardon me, sir. Shave or haircut, sir?"


Furbelow means a vacation for soldiers.


Today is my birthdate "HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME"

21oct10

Two lady school-teachers from Brooklyn, spending their sabbatical year exploring western Canada, stopped at a small and old-fashioned hotel in Alberta recently.
One of the pair was inclined to be worrisome when traveling, and she couldn't rest until she had mde a tour of the corridors to hunt out exits in case of fire. The first door she opened, unfortunately, turned out to be that of the public bath, occupied by an elderly gentleman taking a shower.
Oh, excuse me! the lady stammered, flustered. I'm looking for the fire escape. Then she ran for it.
To her dismay, she hadn't got far along the corridor when she heard a shout behind her and, looking around, saw the gentleman, wearing only a towel, running after her. Where's the fire? he hollered.

Captain John Smith was governor of New York

20Oct10

GUEST--Do you run a bus between the hotel and the railway station?
MANAGER--No sir.
GUEST--That's strange. All my friends said you would get me coming and going?



Garibaldi designed the Statue of Liberty

19oct10

A New York club had replaced its male staff with young and, in some cases, pretty waitresses.
One day a member who had been strongly opposed to the change arrived at the club for lunch.
How's the duck? he asked an attractive waitress, rather gruffly.
"Oh, I'm fine! she replied, perkily. And how's the old pelican himself?

Lady Godiva swam the English Channel.

18Oct10

So you are the new girl, said the young smart aleck to the new waitress in his hotel. What shall we call you?
Pearl, sir.
The Pearl of Great Price?
No, sir, the Pearl cast before swine.


Jack's getting terribly absent-minded of late. Why just the other day he kissed a woman by mistake.
Thought it was his wife, eh?
No, that's just it. It was his wife.


Religious History
1483 Pope Sixtus IV launched the Spanish Inquisition, placing it under joint direction of the Church and state. Tomas de Torquemada, 63, was appointed Grand Inquisitor in charge of removing Jews and Muslims from Spain.
1582 Birth of German scholar Johann Gerhard, most influential of the 17th century Lutheran theologians. His writings attained a European circulation second only to the Bible and Thomas a Kempis' "Imitation of Christ."
1651 French scientist Blaise Pascal wrote in a letter: 'Jesus Christ suffered and died to sanctify death and suffering; he has been all that was great, and all that was abject, in order to sanctify in himself all things except sin, and to be the model of every condition.'
1792 Birth of John Bowring, English statesman, linguist, merchant, theologian and author of the hymn, "In the Cross of Christ I Glory."
1812 In Washington Co., PA, the first of seven eventual conferences convened, leading ultimately to the founding in 1836 of the Evangelical Lutheran Joint Synod of Ohio and Other States

17Oct10
Hotel Clerk---I hope you enjoyed your stay with us, sir.
Departing Guest---Well, the bed was too hard, the price too high, the food was lousy, the service slow, there's too much noise, but, by god, I certainly enjoyed your ice water.


The desk clerk received a call from one of the hotel's guests, an old maid, who complained, There's a man across the court taking a shower and he's got the blinds up.
The house detective was sent to the woman's room to investigate. He looked out her window and then said, I can't see a man over there.
You can't? replied the old maid. Get up on that trunk and look again

16Oct10

Irate Guest--Look, here the rain is simply pouring through the roof of my bedroom.
Summer Hotel Proprietor-- Absolutely according to our prospectus, sir. Running water in every room.



TODAY IN HISTORYOct 16, 1773:
Philadelphia Resolutions criticize Tea Act
Previous Day October 16 Calendar Next Day


The first public statement against the British Parliament's Tea Act was a document printed in the Pennsylvania Gazette on this day in 1773. The document became known as the "Philadelphia Resolutions."

The Tea Act of 1773 was a bill designed to save the faltering British East India Company by greatly lowering its tea tax and granting it a virtual monopoly on the American tea trade. The low tax allowed the company to undercut even tea smuggled into America by Dutch traders, and many colonists viewed the act as yet another example of taxation tyranny. In response, the "Philadelphia Resolutions" called the British tax upon America unfair and said that it introduced "arbitrary government and slavery" upon the American citizens. The resolutions urged all Americans to oppose the British tax and stated that anyone who transported, sold or consumed the taxed tea would be considered "an enemy to his country."

On December 16, 1773, two months after the publication of the resolutions, a group of Massachusetts colonists disguised as Mohawks boarded three British tea ships and dumped 342 chests of tea into the harbor in what is now known as the Boston Tea Party.

Parliament, outraged by this blatant destruction of British property, enacted the Coercive Acts—called the "Intolerable Acts" by the colonists—in 1774. The Coercive Acts closed Boston to merchant shipping, established formal British military rule in Massachusetts, made British officials immune to criminal prosecution in America and required colonists to quarter British troops. The colonists subsequently called the first Continental Congress to consider a united American resistance to the British.

15Oct10

Two ladies were attending a concert or something at the Civic Auditorium. Seated in the parquet, they looked about them.
"Nice building," said one lady.
"What style of architecture is it?"
"I'm not quite sure," said the other lady, "but I think it's Reminiscence."

TODAY IN HISTORY
Oct 15, 1917:
Mata Hari executed
Previous Day October 15 Calendar Next Day
Mata Hari, the archetype of the seductive female spy, is executed for espionage by a French firing squad at Vincennes outside of Paris.

She first came to Paris in 1905 and found fame as a performer of exotic Asian-inspired dances. She soon began touring all over Europe, telling the story of how she was born in a sacred Indian temple and taught ancient dances by a priestess who gave her the name Mata Hari, meaning "eye of the day" in Malay. In reality, Mata Hari was born in a small town in northern Holland in 1876, and her real name was Margaretha Geertruida Zelle. She acquired her superficial knowledge of Indian and Javanese dances when she lived for several years in Malaysia with her former husband, who was a Scot in the Dutch colonial army. Regardless of her authenticity, she packed dance halls and opera houses from Russia to France, mostly because her show consisted of her slowly stripping nude.

She became a famous courtesan, and with the outbreak of World War I her catalog of lovers began to include high-ranking military officers of various nationalities. In February 1917, French authorities arrested her for espionage and imprisoned her at St. Lazare Prison in Paris. In a military trial conducted in July, she was accused of revealing details of the Allies' new weapon, the tank, resulting in the deaths of thousands of soldiers. She was convicted and sentenced to death, and on October 15 she refused a blindfold and was shot to death by a firing squad at Vincennes.

There is some evidence that Mata Hari acted as a German spy, and for a time as a double agent for the French, but the Germans had written her off as an ineffective agent whose pillow talk had produced little intelligence of value. Her military trial was riddled with bias and circumstantial evidence, and it is probable that French authorities trumped her up as "the greatest woman spy of the century" as a distraction for the huge losses the French army was suffering on the western front. Her only real crimes may have been an elaborate stage fallacy and a weakness for men in uniform.

14Oct10
Well I have been gone for a while and I figure that I would start doing this again.
I have been on facebook since I left this and there is nothing new there. So I figure that I will get back into this. Therefore enjoy and tell me whatcha think if you have time.

She--I'm continually breaking into song?
He--You wouldn't have to break in if you'd get the key.


TODAY IN HISTORY
U.S. Air Force Captain Chuck Yeager becomes the first person to fly faster than the speed of sound.

Yeager, born in Myra, West Virginia, in 1923, was a combat fighter during World War II and flew 64 missions over Europe. He shot down 13 German planes and was himself shot down over France, but he escaped capture with the assistance of the French Underground. After the war, he was among several volunteers chosen to test-fly the experimental X-1 rocket plane, built by the Bell Aircraft Company to explore the possibility of supersonic flight.

For years, many aviators believed that man was not meant to fly faster than the speed of sound, theorizing that transonic drag rise would tear any aircraft apart. All that changed on October 14, 1947, when Yeager flew the X-1 over Rogers Dry Lake in Southern California. The X-1 was lifted to an altitude of 25,000 feet by a B-29 aircraft and then released through the bomb bay, rocketing to 40,000 feet and exceeding 662 miles per hour (the sound barrier at that altitude). The rocket plane, nicknamed "Glamorous Glennis," was designed with thin, unswept wings and a streamlined fuselage modeled after a .50-caliber bullet.

Because of the secrecy of the project, Bell and Yeager's achievement was not announced until June 1948. Yeager continued to serve as a test pilot, and in 1953 he flew 1,650 miles per hour in an X-1A rocket plane. He retired from the U.S. Air Force in 1975 with the rank of brigadier general.

28Sep09

"My wife used to play the piano a lot, but since the children came she doesn't have time."
"Children are a comfort, aren't they?"

1915, Ethel Greenglass Rosenberg is born.

1924, Marcello Mastroianni is born.

1934, Brigitte Bardot is born.

1978, Pope John-Paul I dies two months after having been appointed and is succeeded by John-Paul II.

Quote for the day:
The first time a man kisses a girl she is rather surprised, the second time angry; the third time she almost likes it, and the fourth time she is waiting.

27Sep09

Dinner was a little late. A guest asked the hostess to play something. Seating herself at the piano, the good woman executed a Chopin nocturne with precision. She finished, and there was still an interval of waiting to be bridged. In the grim silence she turned to an old gentleman on her right and said:
"Would you like a sonata before going in to dinner?"
He gave a start of surprise and pleasure as he responded briskly:
"Why, yes, thanks! I had a couple on my way here, but I could stand another."

1900, During the Paris Meeting, creation of the International Socialist Office.

1901, Marlene Dietrich is born.

1940, Tripartite (Axis) Pact signed by Germany, Italy and Japan.

1988, The greatest achievement at the Seoul Olympic Games becomes the biggest scandal in Olympic history. Ben Johnson, winner of the 100 metre dash in 9.79 seconds was under the influence of drugs during his victory race on September 24.

Quote for the day:
An experienced husband is one who remembers his wife's birthday, but forgets which one it is.

26Sep09

One of the guests turned to a man by his side to criticize the singing of the woman who was trying to entertain them.
"What a terrible voice! Do you know who she is?"
"Yes," was the answer. "She's my wife."
"Oh, I beg your pardon. Of course, it isn't her voice, really. It's the stuff she has to sing. I wonder who wrote that awful song?"
"I did," was the answer.

1917, Eighty-three-year-old painter Edgar Degas dies.

1923, The German mark becomes so inflated it is worth less than its paper. The German mark's value is 4 million marks to one US dollar. With France's economy also endangered by the inflation, both nations begin to compromise on ways to operated the idled German coal mines central to the war reparations issues.

1962, Sonny Liston knocks out Floyd Patterson to win heavy-weight boxing championship.

Quote for the day:
Some fellows believe in dreams until they marry one.

25Sep09

"Do you sing and play much?" a young man asked the pretty girl who was carelessly thrumming the keys of the piano.
"Only to kill time," she replied.
"You've got to fine weapon, I must admit." ventured the young man.

1926, Henry Ford institutes five-day work week and eight-hour day at his auto plants, to reduce overproduction.

1944, Michael Douglas is born.

1945, The French forces occupy Saigon during three weeks following Ho Chi Minh's declaration of the country's independence, marking the beginning of the IndoChina War.

1952, Christopher Reeve is born.

1954, Audrey Hepburn weds Mel Ferrer.

Quote for the day:
Love consists of a little sighing, a little crying, a little dying-and a deal of lying.

"Why do you go on the balcony when I sing? Don't you like to hear me?"
"It isn't that> I want the neighbors to see that I'm not beating my wife."

1939, Sigmund Freud dies in London.

1953, Rita Hayworth (4th marriage) weds Dick Haymes.

1977, Broadcast of the first of the 227 episodes of The Love Boat

Quote for the day:
Love makes time pass, and time makes love pass.